Chapter 76
Gu Ximian was taking a shower in the room’s bathroom.
The mere realization of this fact made her heart race. Zhuang Chi was restless. To make matters worse, her senses were exceptionally sharp during her susceptible period. The sound of water, which the well-soundproofed door should have blocked, slipped through and unsettled her. It felt as if the atmosphere was painted with too much intimacy, leaving her at a loss for what to do.
...Life is truly unpredictable, Zhuang Chi thought. A few hours ago, she would never have imagined such a development.
The heat of the susceptible period came in waves. Zhuang Chi guessed she was currently in a trough, her thoughts still relatively clear. A moment's reflection made her realize her day had been full of unexpected situations. During the day, she'd had a nonsensical chat with the very polite Notebook, and by night, she'd entered her susceptible period. If her female protagonist hadn't stepped in to help, her long-suffering gland might have finally given out and been ruined by an overdose of suppressants today.
Although she hadn't chosen to be in this situation, even Zhuang Chi knew that thinking about it any more would be like complaining after getting a good deal. She felt she had caused Gu Ximian a lot of trouble and had already decided to give the bed to Gu Ximian for the night. The hotel room's sofa was quite spacious, enough for her to sleep on—not that it mattered much. She probably wouldn't be able to sleep well tonight anyway. She was worried that if she fell asleep, her instincts might take over and make her sleepwalk, which would be no laughing matter. And Gu Ximian smelled so good...
...Speaking of which, Zhuang Chi thought, she was starting to feel that something was off... Wasn't Gu Ximian's attraction to her a bit too strong?
Could it be an innate trait of S-class Omegas... But she had been in close contact with Gu Ximian's pheromones when she was tied up before. Back then, it didn't seem to be like today... um, how to describe it? This uncontrollable desire to smell more, this feeling of unease whenever Gu Ximian was even a little far away...
“...”
No, she probably knew the word to describe this situation.
Could something have been mistaken... Zhuang Chi's heart pounded as she thought in confusion. Was she addicted to Gu Ximian's pheromones? The idea sounded unreasonable, but her current state made it impossible not to consider. Could the doctor have misdiagnosed her all this time? The doctor?
Moreover, her gland, which used to sting every time she thought of Gu Ximian's scent, was now behaving itself. Zhuang Chi silently raised a hand to touch the back of her neck. It felt hot to the touch, but far from hurting, its condition was unprecedentedly good. It felt like the satisfying fullness after a good meal.
...What was wrong with this thing? Even though it was part of her body, she felt like she didn't understand it at all. And now, it was inexplicably making her a little angry.
Zhuang Chi's mood was complicated. Just then, the bathroom door suddenly opened. Gu Ximian's scent, carried by the steam, wafted out warmly. Zhuang Chi jolted and subconsciously stood up from the sofa, staring blankly as Gu Ximian walked out of the bathroom. She must have already dried her hair inside; it was draped casually over her shoulders, giving her a relaxed, languid air.
“Why are you standing?” Gu Ximian looked at her, raising an eyebrow. “Were you standing here the whole time I was showering?”
“...Not really.” Zhuang Chi didn't know why she had suddenly stood up either. She sat down sheepishly, feeling that her unease had kicked up a notch since Gu Ximian appeared. It was about time to sleep, so Zhuang Chi, thinking that striking first was the key to victory, cleared her throat and pointed to the sofa. “I... I'll just sleep on the sofa tonight. You can take the bed.”
“...” Gu Ximian, who was about to get a bottle of water, froze and frowned. “What do you think my answer will be? ‘Oh, okay’?”
Originally, she thought that while the possibility of Gu Ximian agreeing at once was small, it wasn't zero—but now Zhuang Chi knew it was absolutely zero. She looked at Gu Ximian, intending to argue her case, but a bottle of mineral water was thrust into her hands. Gu Ximian sat down gracefully beside her and said naturally, “Can you open this for me?”
Of course she could. Zhuang Chi obediently twisted it open and handed it over. She watched Gu Ximian slowly take a few sips of water. Just as she finally finished and Zhuang Chi was about to resume their previous topic, Gu Ximian beat her to it. “Have you showered already?”
“Yes, I have.” Having no choice but to answer Gu Ximian's question first, Zhuang Chi said honestly, “But I entered my susceptible period after my shower, and I feel like I've sweated again. I kind of want to rinse off one more time...”
Gu Ximian paused, glancing meaningfully at the bathroom. “...Now?”
No way! The steam in the bathroom hasn't even cleared yet! If I go in now, it'll be filled with Gu Ximian's scent! Feeling her ears suddenly burn, Zhuang Chi shook her head vigorously. “No, I mean... I'll go later.”
Gu Ximian nodded silently, and the two of them fell into a wordless silence. At first, Zhuang Chi was too hesitant to speak. After a long while, she suddenly realized: her attempts to discuss the bed and sofa situation were constantly being interrupted. Gu Ximian was changing the subject, wasn't she?
Zhuang Chi steeled herself. Knowing she couldn't beat Gu Ximian at talking in circles, she decided to reason with her directly. She stole a glance at Gu Ximian, intending to sound firm, but when she turned her head, a faint fragrance drifted into her nose. The scent of shampoo and body wash couldn't mask Gu Ximian's original scent. Zhuang Chi blinked, and the words on the tip of her tongue inexplicably took a detour. “...Did you spray perfume on your pajamas too?”
“Hm? No, I didn't.” Gu Ximian looked over, her delicate features showing a hint of confusion. She shook her head. “I spray perfume to block my scent. I only wear pajamas at home, so there's no need to use perfume... Why the sudden question?”
An unexpected answer. Zhuang Chi let out a soft “Huh?” and replied subconsciously, “I just felt like I could smell it...”
She twitched her nose. The scent she inhaled didn't seem any different from before; it was still that mix of pheromones and Gu Ximian's usual perfume. To her, Gu Ximian's pheromones were a sweet and gentle scent, like the softest flower in spring. Gu Ximian's own perfume was cooler in nature, clear and elegant. The two were quite distinct, but they blended together in a surprisingly harmonious way.
But since Gu Ximian said she hadn't sprayed her pajamas, logically, she shouldn't be able to smell the perfume now. Could it be a lingering scent... Zhuang Chi thought dazedly. In that case, this perfume's fragrance really lasts a long time. They had been sitting on the sofa earlier, so if she slept on the sofa tonight, would she be able to smell it all night long—
Ah, she hadn't brought up the topic yet! This time, she had interrupted herself! Zhuang Chi was startled, hating herself for being so useless as she hurriedly threw out the topic. “...Let's not talk about that for now. About sleeping tonight, even if we're sleeping in the same room, we can't sleep in the same bed, right?”
“Why not?” Gu Ximian replied quickly, glancing towards the bed. “Isn't this a 1.8-meter bed? It's big enough for two people.”
That's not the issue! Hearing her speak so matter-of-factly, Zhuang Chi shook her head like a rattle drum. “No, no, Gu Ximian, even if you trust me, there has to be a limit... People are at their most defenseless when they're asleep. The promises I made to you earlier might be completely forgotten once I fall asleep—”
“...Who talks about themselves like that?” Gu Ximian was amused by her, her eyes curving into a smile without a trace of tension. She said leisurely, “If that's really the case, wouldn't sleeping on the sofa be the same? It's only a few steps from the bed.”
Damn it, she made a good point.
Even after Zhuang Chi had rinsed off, lay down in bed, and turned off the lights, she was still thinking about how she had managed to talk herself into a corner while trying to scare the other person.
After Gu Ximian's reply, she couldn't bring herself to say, “I'd be too embarrassed to sleep in the same bed as you.” It would have sounded like she was making a fuss over nothing, especially since Gu Ximian herself hadn't said anything.
...Why wasn't Gu Ximian saying anything?
It was quiet beside her, but Zhuang Chi knew Gu Ximian was lying right there. Never mind the warmth and scent, even the sound of Gu Ximian's shallow breathing was captured with perfect clarity by her overly sharp Alpha senses.
And to Zhuang Chi's great guilt, she did indeed feel a sense of security from having Gu Ximian by her side.
...It made all her earlier struggles seem disingenuous, Zhuang Chi thought. She genuinely felt this wasn't right. After all, her relationship with Gu Ximian hadn't been this intimate before today. They were only being coerced by this sudden event called a susceptible period, forcibly bound together.
To be honest, Zhuang Chi was a little surprised by Gu Ximian's series of actions.
Although Zhuang Chi knew this wasn't part of the plot, from Gu Ximian's perspective, it would be normal to see this as an unreasonable fictional plot device. And Gu Ximian was supposed to hate these kinds of forced scenarios, yet today she was taking a risk to stay by her side, even willing to remain inseparable.
Zhuang Chi wasn't foolish enough to think Gu Ximian would do this for just anyone.
A nightlight was left on in the hotel room, casting faint shadows on the ceiling. Zhuang Chi stared at it for a while before calling out softly, “Gu Ximian.”
“Hm?” The reply came quickly. They were very close, and Gu Ximian's voice sounded as if it were right next to her ear, cool and alluring like jade. “What's wrong? Can't sleep?”
Zhuang Chi felt a slight tickle in her ear that traveled all the way to her heart. She desperately wanted to turn on her side to look at Gu Ximian but forced herself to resist. She didn't know if it was because an Alpha in their susceptible period was too easily aroused, or if it was just her own nature. She only felt that Gu Ximian's presence had become too strong in her heart, bringing with it a kind of fluttering panic that was as hard to grasp as something suspended in mid-air.
She bit her lip and asked in a small voice, “...Why are you willing to help me like this?”
“...” Gu Ximian was silent for a moment. When she spoke again, her voice was very soft. “'Help me like this,' what does that refer to?”
She'd kicked the question right back like a soccer ball. Zhuang Chi thought for a moment and answered seriously, “It's just... I'm in my susceptible period, but you're not afraid of me. You're willing to soothe me with your pheromones, stay by my side, let me hold you, and now you're even...”
—sleeping in the same bed with me. That's what she wanted to say, but Gu Ximian didn't let her finish. “That's enough.”
Even though she was the one who had asked, those three words sounded a bit flustered. Zhuang Chi obediently stopped and waited patiently for a long while before Gu Ximian's next words came. “Then what do you think the reason is?”
There it was again, Zhuang Chi thought. Gu Ximian sometimes liked to talk in circles, hiding the answer in a thick fog, refusing to say it directly, only willing to answer a question with a question.
“...Is it because you think I'm your official match?”
Zhuang Chi heard herself ask this. She hadn't actually thought it through; the words had come out subconsciously, and only then did she realize how much she cared about this matter—this lie.
She hadn't explained at the beginning, and it was even harder to bring up now. What was the difference between an unfalsifiable lie and the truth? The only difference was whether the one person in the world who knew the truth—she herself—would feel uneasy about it.
She would. For her own dishonesty, for the guilt of hiding it from Gu Ximian, Zhuang Chi would feel uneasy.
Gu Ximian fell silent again. Zhuang Chi heard a soft sigh, followed by, “Do you hope that's the case?”
That was the third time. Wasn't that a bit too cunning, Gu Ximian? Even Zhuang Chi couldn't help but chuckle. She felt that Gu Ximian's thoughts today were particularly winding and hard to grasp, like trying to see flowers in a fog. It was as if she was waiting for Zhuang Chi to say something definitive before she would be willing to lift her own thin veil.
But Zhuang Chi didn't feel angry. She had always taken Gu Ximian's words very seriously, and now she would seriously consider it: what kind of answer did she hope to hear?
Regarding the last question, of course she wanted to hear, “That's not it,” Zhuang Chi thought. But what then?
She lost the courage to explain because of the unpredictable unknown, yet she didn't want Gu Ximian to be good to her just because she thought of her as the official match. And shamelessly, Zhuang Chi realized she was thinking—if Gu Ximian knew it was a lie, would she still be this good to her?
Even though she knew in her heart that Gu Ximian wouldn't treat her this way solely for that reason, her initial favor had always been related to it. Every time she thought about it, her thoughts would inevitably get stuck in a rut. If a relationship was twisted and misplaced from its very source, then even if it were to be corrected, how should all their shared experiences and the feelings between her and Gu Ximian be counted? Could they be considered something she had tricked her way into?
The susceptible period seemed to make one weaker. Zhuang Chi closed her eyes, understanding that she was being greedy.
Was it the inherent greed of human nature, or a thirst that had sprung up in Zhuang Chi at some unknown time? It was clearly she, Zhuang Chi, who had chosen to hide the truth, and yet now, it was also she who, like a victim, wanted Gu Ximian to be good to her for other reasons. In a daze, she seemed to see that Pygmalion oil painting again. On it appeared the slightly worn-out Notebook, its black words on a white background like a sharp rap on the head from a god: 【Do you also love Gu Ximian, just as Pygmalion loved Galatea?】
Her body was burning, perhaps from another wave of heat, or perhaps from the immense shock of peeking into a corner of her own heart. In the silence, Zhuang Chi once again smelled the fragrance. No matter how she smelled it, it was mixed with the scent of Gu Ximian's perfume, like a spring that still carried a slight chill, on the verge of all things awakening, a scent that even a clay figure or a wooden puppet couldn't help but take a deep breath of.
So that's how it is. So that's it.
Zhuang Chi suddenly understood. It wasn't that Gu Ximian had sprayed perfume on her pajamas, nor was it a lingering scent in the room.
It was that her favorite scent had, at some unknown point, changed.
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