Chapter 94
Zhuang Chi had a high fever.
It was unclear if this was related to her experience from three years ago, which had ended with her taking on Gu Ximian’s susceptible period suffering. In any case, the doctor’s explanation was that she had caught a chill on the night of the Christmas Ball. When Zhuang Chi woke up, she was in the hospital. Of course, it was Gu Ximian who had brought her here. The girl hadn’t even found the time to change out of her formal dress and had been keeping a constant vigil by her side.
In her memory, she had spent nearly a month with the fifteen-year-old Gu Ximian, but now it seemed that only a few short hours had passed here. Zhuang Chi was somewhat relieved by this—if she had really been unconscious here for a month, the eighteen-year-old Gu Ximian would likely be more than just worried.
With how things had developed, it seemed there were no secrets left between Zhuang Chi and Gu Ximian. Gu Ximian clearly had a lot she wanted to say, but Zhuang Chi’s fever was severe. Even though Zhuang Chi herself wanted to rally her spirits and talk to Gu Ximian as soon as possible, Gu Ximian wouldn’t have it. Not only did she not respond to Zhuang Chi’s attempts to talk, but she also called the doctor the moment Zhuang Chi woke up. Even after the diagnosis, she still had no intention of opening up the conversation. In fact, she seemed much calmer than when Zhuang Chi had first woken up. Under Zhuang Chi’s expectant gaze, she only said curtly, “We can talk about whatever you want after you’ve recovered.”
Her expression was very calm as she said this, showing no cracks in her composure. Lying in bed, Zhuang Chi looked at her and thought to herself that this was probably because Gu Ximian was also very confused. For her, the turn of events had been so sudden; she probably hadn't figured out how to interact with her yet…
Knowing that clearing things up between them would likely take a long time, and that her high fever was indeed not suitable for a long conversation, Zhuang Chi accepted Gu Ximian’s somewhat awkward concern. Even though she was reluctant to take her eyes off Gu Ximian, she obediently closed her eyes at Gu Ximian’s urging and drifted off to sleep.
The moment she closed her eyes, she fell into a deep, sweet slumber. Perhaps it was because her successful return here had brought her a sense of relief, or perhaps it was because she had just recently expended a lot of emotion with the fifteen-year-old Gu Ximian. She had shed too many tears and was exhausted from crying. She didn't know if her body, lying in the hospital bed at that moment, had been crying along with her.
She really needed a good night’s sleep. But fate had other plans. It was clear that Gu Ximian wasn't the only one in this world waiting to talk to her.
Zhuang Chi groggily opened her eyes—this was more of an intention, as she realized in the next second that she was dreaming. It was a very clear feeling; she knew distinctly that in reality, she was still sleeping peacefully.
There was nothing in the dream. Rather, within her line of sight, she could only see a desk, standing solitarily not far away. A desk lamp was on, illuminating the objects on its surface.
Zhuang Chi slowly walked to the desk and sighed softly, “…So you can appear in dreams?”
The familiar notebook on the desk lay there, motionless. After a long silence, it finally, slowly, flipped open a page.
【In the past, on this desk, you were always the one to open me.】 It started a bit off-topic, but fortunately, the Notebook didn't hold a grudge. After one earnest complaint, it didn't continue, changing the subject. 【But regardless, under these circumstances, I believe I should first say to you: Welcome back.】
She was meeting the Notebook in a dream.
Honestly, it would have been better if she could have met it sooner, like three years ago. Zhuang Chi pulled out the chair in front of the desk and sat down. Memories of furiously writing at this very desk flooded her mind, but after what she had been through, seeing Gu Ximian suffer because of the novel's settings, Zhuang Chi could no longer say what she felt about this memory. She sighed silently and said, “Since you can meet me in a dream like this, why did you go to all the trouble of guiding me to the museum before?”
【Answer: At that time, I was not yet able to enter your dreams like this.】
The Notebook answered quickly: 【You are the creator of this world. You are my master. Entering your dream means influencing your consciousness. Under normal circumstances, I am unable to do this.】
“…” Zhuang Chi looked at the words, feeling puzzled but also forming some guesses. Still, she asked, “Then why is it possible now?”
【Answer: Because you voluntarily gave up your power as the creator.】 The Notebook had no intention of hiding anything and stated openly, 【“Whatever power I have, I now transfer it to you”—I believe you probably still remember this sentence.】
Of course, I remember, Zhuang Chi thought. She had said it to Gu Ximian.
The reason seemed to make sense, but upon closer thought, there were too many things that were concerning. Zhuang Chi closed her eyes and picked the most basic question from the many: “…So the time I just experienced, did it just happen, or was it really three years ago?”
【Answer: According to this world’s timeline, it was three years ago.】
Adding a somewhat concerning prefix, the Notebook began its detailed explanation: 【For this world, your actions unfolded in the following order: Three years ago, you appeared in Gu Ximian’s home in an intangible form and spent a month with her, finally transferring your power to her during her susceptible period and disappearing at the same time. Three years later—which is now—you came to St. Blaisedon and reunited with Gu Ximian.】
The more she read, the more her brow furrowed. Zhuang Chi shook her head and said, “…But for me, I first met Gu Ximian at St. Blaisedon and then went back three years. And my earliest memory of coming to this world was when I was not even ten…”
The Notebook was quiet for a moment before replying: 【Yes. According to your timeline, that is indeed the case.】
【You and this world have a severe dislocation at certain points in time. The reason for this conflict,】 the black words slowly appeared, obscure and calm, 【may lie with me. It’s a long story.】
【The starting point was after you told Gu Ximian that this was a novel world. I must first explain: at that time, I judged this to be a very serious matter. I could not estimate how much of an impact the female protagonist knowing such a thing would have on the world. To maintain the world’s stability, the course of action I had prepared was to expel you from this world and simultaneously use my mind-interference ability to delete the female protagonist’s memory.】
【But just as I began your expulsion, you said those words.】 The Notebook paused for a long time here, starting a new line with the words bolded, 【You said, “No one will hurt you again, you will be loved by this world.”】
【Perhaps you have also realized that as the creator, three years ago, you possessed the power to manipulate—or rather, edit and modify—this world. It’s just that your understanding of this power was not clear at the time, and it was difficult to use. Three years ago, this power took effect only a few times. The basis for it taking effect then can be summarized as such: when you subconsciously and genuinely wished for something, it would happen as you wished.】
【Therefore, my thoughts were reshaped by you at that moment. I no longer wanted to do something as excessive as interfering with the female protagonist’s memory.】
【Then, after you transferred your power, my expulsion of you also stopped.】
Reading this, Zhuang Chi let out a slightly puzzled “hmm.” Before she could ask, the Notebook responded: 【I surmise you want to ask why. This is something you indeed do not know, and it really shouldn’t be me telling you. But I judge that I have an obligation to explain it clearly to you now, so I will just have to apologize to Gu Ximian when I get the chance later.】
What did this have to do with Gu Ximian? Zhuang Chi was even more confused. She watched as the Notebook turned a page and new words appeared.
【—After you transferred your power to Gu Ximian, the first wish in her heart that could activate this power was for you not to disappear.】
【In truth, this power was greatly diminished after being transferred to a character in the novel, far less potent than when it was in your possession. Moreover, a wish involving the rules of the world should have been impossible to fulfill. But at that moment, I sensed Gu Ximian’s thoughts, so I stopped your expulsion and instead tried to find a way to keep you in this world.】
【However, as a notebook, I cannot create a new character in the novel by myself. The only method I could think of at that time was to create an identity for you outside the time frame covered by the novel.】
【According to the novel’s setting, Gu Ximian differentiated at the earliest possible age—that is, ten years old. That is the earliest point in time mentioned in the novel.】 The Notebook calmly explained, 【So I made you appear before Gu Ximian turned ten.】
Reading through the long passage, Zhuang Chi’s mind was in a jumble, still unable to sort out the timeline. She murmured, “Then why didn’t I have those memories back then…”
【You need to first understand that this novel unfolds with Gu Ximian as the protagonist, and the world’s temporal progression is also based on her.】 The response came quickly. The Notebook had a certain frankness, as if to say, “Now that I’ve said this much, I might as well say more.” 【At that time, Gu Ximian was only ten years old, and your interaction with her occurred when she was fifteen. You shouldn’t have memories of events that have not yet happened.】
【Your timeline began to be misaligned with this world from that point on. It’s like a fragmented chapter outside the main text of a novel, or a bug in a game. Everything about you was very unstable. I couldn’t predict what kind of impact you would have on this world, so I could only take it one step at a time. Therefore, after you met Gu Ximian and gradually gained more influence over her, I thought that bringing such uncertain factors together was a very dangerous thing, and I kept wondering if I should continue to let you stay in this world.】
【But I still couldn’t do it. You have probably already guessed the reason.】
Zhuang Chi stared at the last line for a long time, a slight ache blooming in her heart as she spoke softly, “Is it because of Gu Ximian?”
To this question, however, the Notebook did not respond directly, but gave a vague reply: 【This question is also not for me to answer. Perhaps you can ask her after you wake up.】
【And I must first apologize to you. When I said at the museum that I would decide whether you stay or go based on your answer, I was actually lying to you. It was just that you and Gu Ximian had already grown closer than anyone else, and I didn’t know how to handle it. So I wanted to have a conversation with you and further ask for your thoughts, or rather, your true feelings. After all, I can see Gu Ximian’s thoughts, but not yours.】
【To this day, I can finally confess to you. I will not do anything to harm you.】 The Notebook wrote solemnly, 【As for you fainting and returning to three years ago after confessing the truth to Gu Ximian, that was not my doing either. I believe it was likely some kind of invisible law of cause and effect. Because at the point in time when Gu Ximian understood that you and Z were the same person, you also had to possess that shared memory, like an anchor point for you. I only realized what was happening as it occurred. I had intended to remind you about how to use the Creator’s Power, but perhaps due to the rules’ restrictions, it seems I was unable to convey it to you properly.】
【As for the injuries you’ve suffered and the kidnapping in the past,】
“…It’s because I chose it that way, right?”
Gradually understanding, Zhuang Chi recalled and said softly before the Notebook could finish, “I said back then… that I should be the one to take full responsibility for the harm my plot brought to Gu Ximian…”
【Yes.】 The Notebook gave an affirmative answer, while also reminding her, 【Such things may still happen in the future. Just as your susceptible period will always be unavoidable with inhibitors. And you need to be aware: the power you transferred to Gu Ximian has been weakened. From my observation, the mechanism by which it now works is this: if Gu Ximian subconsciously believes something will happen, then things will happen as she thinks.】
【For example, if she feels the sky is a bit gloomy and it’s probably going to rain, then it will really rain.】 The Notebook paused for a moment, then continued, 【Another example, if she feels that Lily is deep and calculating and might be a villain in the novel, then this world will really make Lily become a villain.】
“…”
A long-standing confusion was resolved. Zhuang Chi understood what the Notebook was trying to say, and sure enough, she saw it continue to write: 【In a sense, it is a somewhat dangerous ability. It might have been a good thing that she herself has been unaware of it all this time. But looking at it from another angle, if you can make her feel that she will have a happy and fulfilling life ahead, that will also come true—of course, you have already made such a wish once before. I believe that is a wish that will be fulfilled.】
【Even if the Creator’s Power didn’t take effect then, I believe you will make it come true.】
The Notebook had always been frank, and today, perhaps because Zhuang Chi already knew enough, it was holding nothing back. Zhuang Chi looked at the sprawling words. Even though the handwriting was devoid of emotion, she could almost feel a sincere goodwill from it. She nodded solemnly to the Notebook, as if making a silent promise. The Notebook remained quiet for a moment, then changed the subject: 【You are about to wake up.】
【Frequently entering your dreams will be a burden on your mind, so in the future, I will only contact you when a real problem arises in this world. Of course, I hope that day never comes.】
【The plot has indeed changed drastically. Every day from now on is unpredictable. This might be your influence, or it might just be because of Gu Ximian’s thoughts. Regardless, I will do my best to maintain the stability of the world. You don’t need to worry too much.】
Zhuang Chi nodded and thanked it. It was truly strange to think that the notebook that had written those unreasonable, dark history plots was surprisingly a very reliable character. She felt her body become light and floaty, knowing it was likely a sign of waking up. Before she left, she remembered one more thing and blurted out, “…Wait, so why did you bring me to this world in the first place?”
The Notebook fell silent for a long moment, then slowly wrote.
【When Gu Ximian was fifteen, she had already been differentiated for five years. An S-class Omega’s susceptible period occurs about once a month, and each time was just like what you saw before.】
【Even if I hadn’t been changed by your power to care for and protect Gu Ximian so much back then, I am your notebook. After watching that for five years, I couldn’t help but think…】
【If you saw this, you would surely feel sorry for her.】
【So, when I came to my senses, I had already taken the opportunity of your accident in the original world to bring you here. As for the reason… I think it was perhaps because I didn’t want you, who values Gu Ximian so much, to be kept in the dark, and I wanted to give you a chance to do something for her with the Creator’s Power.】
Her vision gradually brightened. Zhuang Chi blinked in a daze. Before leaving the dream, she saw the Notebook’s last sentence, written in an earnest tone with a hint of smugness.
【I guessed right, didn’t I? I told you, I am your notebook, after all.】
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